Toddlers and picky eating (the story of my life)
Adorable red-head, sense of humor beyond his years, social charmer, great sleeper… these are all characteristics that describe my son. However, good eater is not one of those descriptors. Ethan and I have been frustrated with the C Monster’s eating habits since we first put a spoon in his mouth. While our frustrations manifested differently, me catering to his pickiness by offering 30 different options at every meal, Ethan trying to reason or bargain with a toddler, nothing was working. So, last Wednesday night we went to a class that seemed to be very helpful. The approach they presented basically works like this, as parents, we decide where, when and what he eats. As the child, he decides if he wants to eat at all, and if so, he chooses how much of which foods he wants to eat.
What this means for us:
No more grazing, on-demand feeding out of the cabinet, when I’m cooking, or otherwise
Only water between the 3 meals and 2 planned, sit-down snacks (no more gross sippy-cups filled with forgotten milk lingering in the corners of our house and car!)
No more spilling drinks or snacks as he carries them around
I (we) have be very intentional about having dinner ready at a reasonable time (which for him is usually before or by 6 PM… this is a hard one)
No more using food as a distraction or manipulation
He is allowed to have seconds and thirds of whatever is offered at the table, without trying everything on his tray. Yes, this means that he could potentially fill up on bread and fruit every meal, if offered. But no walking back to the kitchen to offer substitute meals or replenish the bread bowl, etc.
Obviously, we are going to be flexible with this, while providing as much structure as possible.
***Warning: The following -and preceding, actually- might be incredibly boring if you’re not interested in the minute details of our parenting
Here is how its gone so far. I’ll write everything we offered at each meal, and what he actually ate in bold:
Day #1
B- Whole-wheat waffle with peanut butter, yogurt, blueberries
S- *At school he eats a structured, sit-down, typical preschool snack consisting of goldfish or graham crackers, etc. As far as I know, he always eats at least some.
L- Orange slices, garlic bread, pasta
S- Pears, cereal, yogurt
D- Avocado, bacon, corn chips, cheese, tomatoes, chicken
Day #2
B- Toast w/peanut butter, cereal, yogurt
Overall, we are noticing him eating more at each meal than he normally would. The hardest habit to break for me will be the snack I use to keep him in a good mood between school and home. I’ll give it a week or two, and I might just end up brining lunch to school if I need to. The whole change hasn’t seemed too hard on Carver, I think the structure of our weekdays helps. I’m pretty excited to have any sort of plan to go off of, and it helps so much with decision-making tension between the grown-ups.
Good ideas, suggestions and questions are very welcome!
Beth Ann says:
I do all of this except for the using food as manipulation. It is sooooo hard to not give him a snack while in the grocery cart or the stroller.
Still fighting this one!
I get so frustrated, too, that he USED to eat everything he doesn’t like now!
Amanda says:
I’ve pretty much always given Ans her snack in the high chair and I think it helps. I have started letting her sip on milk throughout the day though and I agree the cup situation is gross. I may start cutting that out with you. I Also really like this blog: http://blog.superhealthykids.com/ for the weekly meal ideas and that she includes a snack. Not only do I think about it for Ansley, but pregnant ladies need snack options too!